Not quite as dirty as Pigpen, but damn would he give Charlie a run for his football. I’d love to fuckin’ Spin this City half past two just to see two men run around lookin’ for the other half. Speaking of a hard twist I just knocked the “A” outta that Honda bitch and now it’s hung up by a cord. Still lookin’ better than my Protégé, but that sad bastard got cubed. Couldn’t afford to raise it the forth, but boy did I try. Like a bat outta hell I hit that brake like a pair of cubes hittin’ an avenged glass of Bacardi. Once the sun fell behind those mountains that Friday the liquid courage was repurposed, rebuilt for a proverbial mind fuck. To forget Sarah Marshall? Nah, to forget the days’ events. Who wants to remember, who wants to forget?
Here’s the quick: those that know nothing…like a group of tea partyers? To drunk, strung out, and hypocritical to realize that they’re a staggerin’ mob of stupidity all amassed to show the world that Americans are dumbasses. They’re like a rave gone awry. A 12-grain not worth the dollar bill used to harvest that crop. New Zealand is looking more and more promising, but who the fuck wants to voyage to a land filled with Hobbits? Pete better come out of that Warehouse soon because whose gonna save us now, Sully? That blue monster sure looks like a certain cookie muncher to me, but who am I to judge? Oh, wait like most other Americans I’ll take a moment to conserve intelligence and judge that muncher like they do. Those that enjoy the drapes that match the carpet don’t clean just like a crazed Sheen because truthfully who wants to steam clean that bitch? Certainly not Bert, and certainly not Ernie, because when those two elope all New Yorkers will stand and shout. That might get the stain out, but Johnson & Johnson might have a Danon Fit.
What’s that old saying? When life hands you lemons, make lemonade? Fuck that. Hand ‘em back ask for limes…better yet squirt that shit in life’s eye, mug ‘em for oranges and make a screwdriver because if you don’t you’re going to get nailed. Back to the gays…Michael J. Fox better chase that Delorean because once we hit the past we’re going to wish we went Back to the Future.